Shadows will breathe

Shadows will breathe
"Careful. Evil has a way of making friends with the good and dragging them into the darkness." ~ Dr. Al Robbins

Tuesday, January 17, 2017

Hello Again

My Dear Creepsters,

I am back.
For the last couple months I have been shrouded in darkness.
I have been sad and angry and a bit self-destructive.
Death can do that to someone.  

I am working through it.
I am - slowly - picking myself back up and reentering the world of the living, trying my best to find my footing once again.
As anyone who has experienced this kind of loss knows, some days are better than others.
Time is both a friend and a foe.
Life is both a gift and a chore.
One minute, I'm moving along and thinking to myself - sometimes even talking to myself aloud - Yeah, I got this and It'll all be okay.  The next minute, it's as if someone has slugged me in the gut and I crumble, hugging my knees and heaving sobs like a child.  

I lost my sister; my best friend; the greatest part of me.  And even though I know she is in a better place, and that, someday - when Time decides - I will get to see her again, be with her again, laugh with her again, there are times when I just cannot be consoled.

Time is helping with the wound.
It's a double-edge sword though, isn't it?

Writing helps.
It gets me to quiet the voices and maintain a bit of mental control - at least for a little while.

Your support helps.
All of the messages and love and kind words.
I wonder if you know how much that means to me?
Thank you, Creepsters - you know who you are - thank you for checking in with me over the last couple months, even if it was just to say Hi or Happy Holidays or You are missed.
Thank you.
I am truly grateful for you, for being here with me to welcome me back, and for being part of this community.  And now that I am broken, I'm assuming only more darkness will seep out of me.  I hope you're ready for it.

Shall we Creep On together?
Shall we move through 2017 as a unified front?  As a dominating force?
I'm ready if you are, Creepsters.

Let's do this.

Sincerely,
♡Deevious 


6 comments:

  1. I love you with all my heart, miss Deevious.
    You're strong as hell and don't you ever forget that.
    I'm glad to see you post, I'm glad to see you try and find your way to some light in these dark times. We're here for you, no matter what, and I hope you hold onto that light, and carry it into the darkness with you when you visit it.

    <3 Much love,
    Jenny

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    1. Thank you so much, Jenny.
      I love you back. <3

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  2. Dee, That was so beautifully written! Please keep writing! I think about you so much. Kim was an amazing woman. She touched the lives of everone who was fortunate enough to have known her.
    Love Sharon

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    1. Thank you, Sharon. I hope this finds you gaining some ground too, I know how close you two were. Big hug.

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  3. I cry not for the sake of those who have moved on, but selfishly for myself, left behind once again. Like you, I find the strength to keep breathing by having faith that while it may be a long journey to see them again, this world's journey will indeed end some day, and a reunion there will be. Hugs to ya.

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